Inside

I am just a scared little child
Afraid of what you really think
Afraid of what you really see
Afraid of who I really am
I don’t think you will fail
I don’t think you have completely lost your way
I don’t think you have entirely left him
I do think that I might fail
I do fear I again will completely lose my way
I do wonder if I even know him
I used to admire your certainty
I wanted to use it as a guide to find my own
I fear now that I have caused you to lose yours
Afraid that I am bringing you down
Afraid that I will slowly ruin your confidence
Afraid I cannot stop the inevitable
I don’t think you would let me bring you down
I don’t think I am the only harming your confidence
I don’t think I know the inevitable
I do know that you lift me up
I do know that you raise my confidence
I do know that I try; but merely I fail
I wonder am I getting closer to the goal
I’m I failing less each time/less often
I probably have false hope there
Either way- how am I to know
I cannot seem to see past my insecurity, fear, and irrationality to know